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Thursday, February 7, 2013

Drinking With Men


Today, NPR ran a story on a new memoir titled Drinking With Men. I have not read the book, but based on the interview, I left this comment on NPR. 

I am author of my own memoir, Daughter of the Drunk at the Bar. I wonder if Rosie Schaap and others like her ever consider the possibility that the men she shares drinks and camaraderie with might be there at the expense of their marriages and children? If he's being the generous big spender buying the drinks, I wonder if she knows he's just blown his kid's lunch money for the next day, or the electric bill for the month? The subtitle of my book is: For every regular manning a barstool there is likely a family at home. I'm not saying it is Ms. Schaap's responsibility to know or care. I just used to get the willies when I heard someone, mostly drinking buddies, say what a swell guy my father was, when he was abusive and pissing our money and our family down the drain.
This piece seems to romanticize "bar culture." When the guy at the bar is your alcoholic dad, it isn't romantic at all.

I do realize I am seeing this through my own lens, and I can't speak to the experience of all bar regulars.